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 Trauma comes in all shapes and sizes and can have a profound impact on an individual's mental, emotional, and physical well-being. For those who struggle with the effects of trauma, finding effective treatment options is crucial. One approach that has gained recognition in recent years is Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART). Developed by Laney Rosenzweig, a licensed mental health counselor, the ART basic protocol offers a promising avenue for trauma resolution.
Drawing from evidence-based therapies such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), somatic therapy, and traditional psychotherapy, Rosenzweig crafted a unique and innovative approach that could be adapted to many different clinical presentations. ART utilizes a combination of rapid eye movements, relaxation techniques, and memory reconsolidation to process traumatic memories and facilitate healing. The common saying in ART is that through the process we “keep the knowledge and lose the pain” associated with traumatic memories and associated symptoms. The client's brain no longer attaches, or relates to the trauma in the same way, allowing one to move forward having a new relationship with the events or themes that have kept them stuck. As a clinician trained in this unique protocol, it has been so rewarding to witness clients make such significant changes in as little as 1-5 sessions. From helping a young woman viciously attacked by dogs and stuck in fear leave a session excited to go to the dog park, to watching an older individual change their relationship with incidents of childhood abuse that plagued their life, it truly can be life altering. This approach has also been extremely helpful working with partners who have been betrayed in their relationship. During an ART session, the therapist guides the client through a structured process that involves visually focusing on the therapist's hand movements while recalling distressing memories or sensations related to the trauma. The great thing about ART is that you can share as little or as much as you want with the therapist, removing the need to talk about every detail. The eye movements used in ART help facilitate the processing of traumatic memories, allowing them to be reconsolidated in a less distressing manner. The therapist helps the client replace negative images and emotions with more positive and adaptive ones. ART also incorporates relaxation exercises to release trauma stored in the body and help clients feel more grounded and in control throughout the process. Research on ART has shown promising results in the treatment of trauma-related disorders. Studies have demonstrated significant reductions in symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), anxiety, depression, and other trauma-related conditions after just a few ART sessions. The accelerated nature of the therapy, with many clients experiencing resolution is a remarkable aspect that sets ART apart from traditional therapies. While further research is ongoing, initial findings suggest that ART can be a highly effective intervention for trauma survivors seeking relief and healing. Accelerated Resolution Therapy may not be for everyone, and results may vary depending on a variety of factors. However, if you or someone you know has experienced trauma and want to explore ART as a potential path toward healing and reclaiming a sense of well-being I would love to connect.
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Unwanted sexual behaviour and addiction is a complex and challenging issue that affects individuals on multiple levels, often leaving a trail of pain and brokenness in its wake. However, amidst the struggle, there is hope for healing and transformation. In the transformative approach advocated by Jay Stringer, being aware of how you are acting out and embracing healthy sexuality can serve as a powerful antidote.
Sexual addiction and compulsivity are not merely about the quantity of sexual behaviors but rather the underlying emotional, psychological, and relational factors that drive unwanted sexual behaviors. Jay Stringer's work sheds light on the importance of understanding the root causes of of the unwanted behaviour, whether its looking at porn every couple weeks or seeking sexual partners daily, to create a lasting change. Contrary to popular belief, the path to healing from sexual addiction is not about completely avoiding sex or suppressing sexual desires. Instead, it involves the intentional cultivation of healthy sexuality and intimacy. Stringer suggests the antidote to unwanted sexual behaviors is not less sex, but rather more, but healthy sex. The work includes:
If you or someone you know is struggling with sexual addiction, know that there is hope. By embracing healthy sexuality, addressing underlying wounds, and seeking professional support, you can embark on a journey towards a more fulfilling and authentic life. Change is a very difficult and uncomfortable process for most of us. Even when we know that change is necessary for growth, we tend to resist it. In fact, we are wired to resist it being that we are "self regulating systems" that seek stability or homeostasis. Understanding the concepts of first and second order change can help us overcome resistance that impedes our growth and progress.
First Order Change First order change refers to making superficial or less sustainable changes to behavior or actions without addressing the underlying beliefs, attitudes, and values etc. that led to our current situation. For example, if we are struggling with a porn addiction, we may be able to stop cold turkey and white knuckle not acting out for a period of time without addressing the underlying emotional or psychological factors that led to addiction in the first place. While first order change can be helpful in the short-term, and is generally needed initially, it often does not lead to sustained change. First order change is often easier and requires less effort and commitment than addressing deeper, more complex issues that are running underneath. This makes it appealing to individuals not ready to make more fundamental changes. It is uncomfortable and challenging to examine our beliefs, attitudes, values, etc. and to acknowledge that they may be contributing to our current situation. Many people come into therapy with the goal to stop a certain behaviour not recognizing that this does not happen in a vacuum. As the saying goes in addiction recovery circles, "stopping is easy, staying stopped is the hard part". This is where second order change comes in. Second Order Change Second order change takes us to the next level. It requires us to examine and address the root causes of our current situation and to make significant changes to our thinking and behavior. For example, we may engage in therapy or counseling to address underlying trauma, emotional issues, relationship or family dysfunctions, develop new coping skills and self-awareness, and make sustainable changes to our lifestyle. This is where we roll up our sleeves and dig in to the work. Committing to second order change can feel like a daunting task, especially if we are not ready or willing to commit. It requires a significant amount of effort and can be painful at times, but for those who are ready, it is a path of great reward. It brings a sense of empowerment and confidence. It brings meaning to our suffering. This is why recovery is often spoken of by those who have done the work as a "gift". Overcoming Resistance to Change So, how can we overcome our resistance to change? The first step is to acknowledge and understand the concepts of first and second order change. By recognizing and accepting that superficial changes are often not enough, we can open ourselves up and begin to explore the deeper issues that may be contributing to our current situation. Additionally, we can work on developing a growth mindset, which involves embracing challenges, leaning into discomfort, and viewing setbacks as opportunities for learning and growth. If you have found yourself stuck in a pattern of unwanted behaviour and can't seem to find any traction or lasting change, assess what level of change your are in and take the next steps, when you are ready, to achieve sustained growth and personal transformation.  As a couples therapist, I have seen many couples who wait too long before seeking therapy. Many couples believe that their problems will simply go away on their own, or they may feel embarrassed or ashamed to seek help. Often they wait to reach out when one or both of them are already at a place where they don’t want to continue the relationship and want to say they “tried” therapy. Most often this just delays the inevitable and often makes the therapist over responsible for the ending of the relationship.
If you're in a relationship and you're experiencing difficulties, it's important to seek help as soon as possible. Here are some reasons why waiting too long can be detrimental to your relationship:
If you're experiencing difficulties in your relationship, don't wait before seeking help. The sooner you address the issues, the easier it will be to resolve them. Couples therapy can be a powerful tool for improving your relationship and creating a deeper connection with your partner. Jeff Whitehead MSW RCSW CMAT CSAT  Perhaps you have heard of the common acronym for denial: Don’t Even kNow I Am Lying. I believe we have all experienced our own denial at some point in our lives about something or other. When it comes to addiction recovery, whether it be from alcohol, drugs, sex, pornography, gambling etc. it can’t be avoided. Thats why in the 30 task model of sexual addiction recovery created by Dr. Patrick Carnes, “Breaking Through Denial” stands as the number one place to start.
In psychology, denial can be defined as a defense mechanism in which acknowledging a problem or reality is avoided, or in other words refusing to admit the reality of something unpleasant. It is a quite natural response and often occurs without much conscious help. Denial often presents itself through unhelpful thinking distortions. The intention is to protect oneself from getting too overwhelmed with painful feelings of despair, shame, or judgment from self or others etc., but paradoxically, denial only enhances such feelings, and reinforces the cycle of compulsive behavior, thoughts, and addiction if not addressed. A leader in the field of sexual addiction and compulsive behaviour, Dr. Rob Weiss, identified a few ways that denial presents itself:
Walking through this initial task of recovery will open one's view and create a whole new lens through which to see themselves and the path ahead. It is not easy, but many have walked it and opened the gate to real and lasting change. If you think you or someone you care about has a problem with porn or other compulsive sexual behaviour, go here and take the free, confidential screening test.  Core beliefs are longstanding, central ideas one holds about themselves, others, and the world around them. We develop these strongly held and inflexible ideas throughout our lives in response to the interaction of our experiences, temperament, and personality. Often the building blocks of our core beliefs are established early in life and may be the result of attempts to protect us. These beliefs become the lens through which the events of our lives are viewed and inform not only how we think, but what we feel and how we behave.
Often the core beliefs we internalize can be unhelpful and even irrational because they ignore the evidence to the contrary in our present circumstances. While possibly once helpful, we continue to look through the same filter as the past, and apply it to our present. Sometimes the core beliefs we hold are real or perceived messages we received from others such as care-givers, peers, teachers, church leaders. Etc. Commonly we take these and assume them to be accurate and true. Many times we don’t even realize the core beliefs we are hanging onto because they become so much a part of us. When working with individuals, it is often not until we start paying attention to, and exploring thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that we uncover the beliefs lying at the core. Once we can see these and identify their origins, we can begin to create space for a new way of seeing the world and ourselves in it. These core beliefs don’t just go away. After all, they have been such a huge part of us for so many years. However, we know from neuroscience that we can actually change the pathways in our brain to a new way of experiencing life. I often use the analogy of a hiking trail. Over time, as more and more people use a certain trail up a mountain it becomes well worn, and easier to navigate. We don’t have to worry about where to go next because the path is laid out ahead of us. This is like the pathways created in our brains. We don’t even have to think about it and our core beliefs will take over and lead us how to feel and behave. As we start to uncover the unhelpful beliefs and patterns we have been following we can start bushwhacking a new trail. It takes some work, but eventually a new trail starts to take shape-and the views are amazing! We may find ourselves back on the old path occasionally, but with practice, we can bring ourselves back. Eventually, the old trail gets overgrown and less easy to find. In addressing addiction, it is so important to discover the core beliefs that are sitting under the unhelpful thoughts, obsessions, rituals, damaging behaviours, and shame. When we don’t the cycle is reinforced and ultimately the beliefs strengthen. Dr. Patrick Carnes research on compulsive behaviour and sexual addiction has uncovered 4 core beliefs common among those struggling: 1) I am basically a bad and unworthy person. 2) No one could love me as I am. 3) I cannot rely on others to meet my needs. 4) My most important need is… (fill in the blank with the compulsive behaviour) If this sounds familiar, help with an expert professional can help you get unstuck and move past the core beliefs that have held you hostage.  There have been many attempts made over the years to define addiction. In 2019 the American Association of Addiction medicine defined it as: “a treatable, chronic medical disease involving complex interactions among brain circuits, genetics, the environment, and an individual’s life experiences. People with addiction use substances or engage in behaviors that become compulsive and often continue despite harmful consequences” So, what does this mean, and how does it relate to pornography and associated behaviours? It’s only been in recent years that we are really starting to understand the nature and impact of pornography on those who regularly consume it, their loved ones, and our culture and society. With the advent of the internet came the accessibility, anonymity, and affordability of online pornography no one could have imagined in decades past. Indeed, pornography has become a mainstream pastime; and you would be hard pressed to find a young person who hasn’t or doesn’t consume it at least occasionally. I’m not saying that all who use pornography are addicts, any more than everyone who drinks alcohol has a substance use disorder. That said; it is a growing concern as more and more turn to it for a number of reasons (emotional regulation, comfort, sexual connection) and their brain gets hijacked. While there is no formal recognition of, or criteria for sexual or pornography addiction in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of mental Disorders, there is growing consensus among professionals regards this addiction, confirming what those of us working with this population have known for quite some time. In the past year the most recent edition of the International Classification of Diseases created criteria for Compulsive Sexual Behaviour Disorder, further legitimizing problematic sexual behaviour. Often in making a diagnosis of sexual or pornography addiction we draw upon 10 criteria that research suggests are common for those struggling. Loss of Control – Clear behaviour in which you do more than you intend or want to. This may be feeling powerless over the behaviour or thinking patterns. Some describe going into “autopilot” or “zoning out” when acting out and feel like they can’t do anything about it. Compulsivity – Out of control behaviour over time. An irresistible urge to act out again and again. Efforts to Stop – Have tried to control or stop the behaviour without success. Perhaps you’ve told yourself many times that “this is the last time”, but you always go back. Maybe you’ve tried different strategies but can’t maintain the changes. Loss of Time – Significant amounts of time lost engaging in and/or recovering from a behaviour. Perhaps intending to look at one video and realizing that hours of past. Maybe you stayed up later than intended watching porn and now are behind on your work etc. Preoccupation – Obsessing about or because of the behaviour. This may include replaying images/experiences in one’s mind, fantasizing, objectifying, planning etc. Inability to Fulfill Obligations. Perhaps you’ve missed family events, not completed work or school projects, gone into debt etc. due to your use of pornography and related behaviour. Continuation Despite Consequences Many have experienced employment, relationship, legal, health, or problems as a result, yet continue to engage in the behaviour. Escalation Over time the frequency, duration, and/or the intensity of the pornography or related behaviour increases. Many identify crossing boundaries they never thought they would. Losses Individuals often lose, limit, or end up sacrificing valued parts of themselves such as hobbies, spirituality, relationships, or employment. Withdrawal Often when addiction is present, and one tries to stop they may experience considerable distress, anxiety, restlessness, irritability, and even physical discomfort and symptoms. Research suggests that meeting at least 3 of the above criteria often points to addiction. However, as identified by the definition of addiction above, it is often very complex. Addiction includes an interaction between biology, psychology, and experiences, and so too must assessment and appropriate treatment. If you suspect you or someone you care about has a problem, exploring it with an expert such as a Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist (CSAT) can be very helpful. Jeff Whitehead, MSW, RCSW, CMAT, CSAT Registered Clinical Social Worker |
AuthorJeff Whitehead, MSW Archives
June 2023
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