Don't Wait for Couples Work

As a couples therapist, I have seen many couples who wait too long before seeking therapy. Many couples believe that their problems will simply go away on their own, or they may feel embarrassed or ashamed to seek help. Often they wait to reach out when one or both of them are already at a place where they don’t want to continue the relationship and want to say they “tried” therapy. Most often this just delays the inevitable and often makes the therapist over responsible for the ending of the relationship.
If you're in a relationship and you're experiencing difficulties, it's important to seek help as soon as possible. Here are some reasons why waiting too long can be detrimental to your relationship:

1. Communication Breakdown: One of the most common problems that couples face is communication breakdown. When communication breaks down, it can be difficult to resolve conflicts or even understand each other's needs and desires. If left unchecked, this can lead to resentment and a breakdown of the relationship.
2. Built up resentment: When problems are not addressed, resentment can build up over time. This can create a toxic environment where both partners feel angry and frustrated, and it may become more difficult to resolve conflicts.
3. Escalation of problems: If problems are not addressed, they can escalate over time. What may have started as a minor issue can turn into a major one if left unchecked. This can make it even more difficult to resolve the issue and may require more intensive therapy.
4. Decreased intimacy: Relationship problems can lead to a decrease in intimacy and closeness between partners. This can lead to feelings of loneliness and disconnection, which can be detrimental to the relationship.
5. More difficult to resolve problems: The longer you wait to address problems, the more difficult it may be to resolve them. This is because negative patterns of behavior can become ingrained over time, making it harder to change them.

It's important to remember that seeking therapy doesn't mean that your relationship is failing. In fact, it can be a sign of strength and a commitment to improving your relationship. Therapy can help you and your partner to learn new communication skills, resolve conflicts, and develop a deeper understanding of each other and your relationship patterns.
If you're experiencing difficulties in your relationship, don't wait before seeking help. The sooner you address the issues, the easier it will be to resolve them. Couples therapy can be a powerful tool for improving your relationship and creating a deeper connection with your partner.

​Jeff Whitehead MSW RCSW CMAT CSAT

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